Adam Gorightly’s Inner Journey

The photo below is a journey into the center of my mind…er, I mean, behind, taken during a recent colonoscopy as air was shot into my colon and a video camera inserted to see how I’m doing in there, inside my derrière. And everything was just fine, thank you very little!

journey2.jpg

 

Anyway, it was a weird experience in more ways than one, not only ‘cause I got to bring home this creepy photo that looks like something straight out of Alien. But the weirdest part of the whole procedure was being administered the anesthetic drug Versed, which is really wonderful in one respect, but on the other hand quite frightening. The positive aspect of the drug is that it immediately and completely propels its recipient into LALA-land as soon as its administered and you remember absolutely nothing (at least with your conscious mind) of what occurred. But on the flipside, the scary part of the drug is that you are actually conscious under its influence, and can even respond and carry on a conversation, however you have no memory of what you said, or what transpired, which makes it the perfect drug for interrogation, or even date rape, as some have suggested. Hell, maybe the aliens use this stuff when they’re doing their own anal probing on us humans. Versed creates “missing time.”

Right before the colonoscopy was to begin, as I lay in the hospital robe on my side with ass bare and ready for probing, I shared a minute or two of casual conversation with the doc and his nurses, then he said, “Here comes the drug,“ and my last thoughts/words were, ”Oh yeah, I can feel it coming on…” Then as far as I know I went under, and one would assume of course that you’re asleep…The next thing I know I’m in one of the post-procedure rooms, seated down fully dressed, and the nurse says something, leaves the room, then I turn and see my wife sitting by me, and I say, “How long have you been here?” and she looks at me like a dummy.

The following day, I got to thinking about it, and it dawned on me that I had absolutely no memory of getting dressed. I asked my wife about this later, and she was dumbfounded. She explained how I dressed myself standing up and she kept telling me to sit down, and I kept saying, “Nah nah, I’m OK.” But she was as blown away as I when I told her later that I had no actual memory of getting dressed!

Anyway, this Versed is some weird shit, but it certainly makes it all quick and painless (I guess).

btw, there’s a group of bloggers called Versed Busters vehemently opposed to the use of the drug, and you can check out their blog here.

  

~ by gorightly on March 3, 2008.

5 Responses to “Adam Gorightly’s Inner Journey”

  1. Adam, I can’t believe you pulled a Katie Couric! A live journey would have been better, but this is great! The last pic doesn’t look too good. Are you sure it’s OK?

    Joan

  2. Well, they told me I was a-ok, but they also doped me up with that scary Versed stuff, so who knows…

    I was sitting around talking to some friends a couple days after the procedure and we all started sharing tales about each other’s colonoscopies, which resulted in me commenting “You know you’re gettig old when…” And so it goes, to qoute Vonnegut.

  3. […] a looksee at your patootie! Which may have its advantages, because as I documented in this previous post, the drugs used to put you under during the “prodecure” are akin to amnesia inducing […]

  4. I was surprised how quickly I was knocked out. They tell you you’ll be relaxed, not unconscious.

  5. That’s the deal, you’re are never actually unconscious, because you can communicate through the whole process,you just don’t remember. It’s kind of like amnesia. That drug is weirdo, man.

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